At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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