walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
