So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
