Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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