lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize
