he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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