But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
