she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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