I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
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