Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Randomize
