Porn is love you can see.
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
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