puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
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