Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
it glows. i had to have it.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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