the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
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