He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
