Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
Randomize