So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
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Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
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