Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize