you win again, gameday.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
