She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
