I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
MIDGETS
????
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
