tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Randomize