It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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