Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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