piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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