She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
Randomize
