David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
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