508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
Randomize
