I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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