I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
We have started to decorate penises.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize
