You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
not ubering you a puppy
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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