I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
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