he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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