Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Randomize
