I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
Come see our sink grown plant.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Randomize
