hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
How external is "for external use only"?
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Randomize
