I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Randomize
