Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
There r osticjed everywhere
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
