I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
What happened to fro yo and sex?
did you just send me my own nude
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
