You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize