Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
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