Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
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