you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Randomize
