3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
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I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
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The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
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