I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
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