well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
He told me they were just razor bumps!
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
