last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
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