I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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