i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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