He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
So much Jack, so little girl.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
